President Bush has had a very rough 2006. To start with, he turned 60 in August and, by November 8, Bush looked and felt 85.
Only Saddam Hussein had a worse year than Bush, but at least Saddam no longer has to worry about broken resolutions, income taxes, or gaining weight.
Bush, on the other hand, has made his 2007 resolutions public as listed below. Included are the actions Bush intends to take in order to meet his resolutions:
* Get U.S. Troops out of Iraq.
Action: Order them to invade Iran.
* Avoid impeachment by a hostile Congress.
Action: Order the Marines to take over the U.S. House and Senate mail rooms with orders to destroy and all subpoenas.
* Avoid ridicule during the State of the Union speech.
Action: Tape it and send a DVD copy to Nancy Pelosi and Harry Reid.
* Improve approval rating to 35%.
Action: Hire Jeb Bush as the new White House pollster.
* Minimize the effectiveness of Nancy Pelosi:
Action: When signing the Defense Appropriations bill, attach a Signing Statement to revoke California’s statehood, thereby making Pelosi ineligible to serve as Speaker.
* Ease Concerns about border security:
Action: Cancel border fence and move southern border to Nicaragua
* Fix illegal immigration crisis.
Action: Pardon all 20 million illegal aliens now in America.
* Meet military recruitment goals.
Action: Bring back the draft and conscript needed bodies from among those former illegal aliens.
* Improve foreign language skills.
Action: Take remedial English at Crawford City College and work to make Spanish America’s official language.
* End partisan battles with Democrats
Action: Change party affiliation to Democrat, and destroy that Veto pen in the Oval office.
Good luck, Mr. Bush!
John W. Lillpop
San Jose, California
John W. Lillpop is a recovering liberal, “clean and sober” since 1992 when last he voted for a Democrat. Pray for John: He lives in the San Francisco Bay Area, where people like Nancy Pelosi are actually considered normal!
Tags: Guest Blogging
December 31, 2006 at 6:29 pm
Happy New Year, John and everyone else!
God bless our troops. Go read a milblog, send a card and/or a pkg to a soldier serving far from home. God bless our country in the coming new year and guide our president as he makes hard decisions.
December 31, 2006 at 11:32 pm
You said it all, John. I’m not a blogger just a reader of them, and since I discovered Basil’s blog I have to check every day to see what you have to say. Happy New Year.
January 1, 2007 at 12:33 am
I don’t care this dictator dies, but I have to thank him for helping me win a lot of money as I bought his stock in time on trendio
http://www.trendio.com/word.php?wordid=120&language=en
January 1, 2007 at 1:06 am
Happy New Year!…
I hope that all who review their 2006 will find it on balance, to be positive and I wish all of you a blessed 2007……
January 1, 2007 at 8:39 pm
[...] Here are some new Year’s resolutons to go with that. [...]